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I'm a PC! A Windows 7 PC!

Texas rocker Joe Ely sings, "The road goes on forever, but the party never ends." But this week saw the coming and going of 2010's Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas and to tell you the truth I can recall THREE major things about the show. (I was only following the show via webcasts, web sites from Mashable, Engadget and Gizmodo, and the hot channel for insider info, Twitter.) So if I truly missed something I am dying for someone to tell me.

My TOP THREE CES Revelations Yawns for 2010! (The Yawnies!)

1. Microsoft has lost their way completely without Bill Gates to play the genius straight man to  Steve Ballmer's teenager act.

2. TV's are about as exciting as wearing glasses to see 3D movies. (My apologies to AVATAR which pushed the medium further than it had gone before.)

3. Phone, phones, phones. INTPS (It's Not the Phone Stupid) So the Nexus One is gonna have Android. (oh neato!) And everyone else has an Android phone as well, EVEN DELL for goodness sake. And Palm is still trying. And finally referring to #1, Steve Ballmer did a miserable job buzzing up excitement for ANY mobile device with Windows Mobile (formerly Windows CE).

That's it?

Did SONY bring any light to the party? Was there anything bigger than 3D TV? (That seemed to be the ONLY buzz)

As the movie and tv industry introduced the 3D technology, their refrain was "eliminating piracy" and "enhanced viewing experience.") As 3D has been a saving grace for movie theaters worldwide the TV and media companies are hoping for a similar rebirth of TV. I guess "thinner" TVs are cool. Bigger TV's are cool. And HD-HD-HD-ULTRA are cool. But the real concern is, once you've got your TV, do you want another and another? Is there a compelling reason to spend MORE for your next television when the prices keep falling per square inch and per technology? (In a word, NO.)

The same problem exists with the PHONES PHONES PHONES. Yes, Android is a contender. Yes the Nexus One is nice if you are renewing your contract and not paying $500+ for the phone. But… honestly, if your phone works, if you are happy with you phone, the there's got to be a compelling reason to get a new phone. (Anger at ATT perhaps?) So if you are not in the market for a phone, if your contract still has a poison escape penalty, do you really care about the Nexus One? (I've got a Blackberry Curve 8900 and I could care less for an iPhone or an Android clone. My son's iTouch is great for gaming though, but typing on a iPhone is a pain.)

<harshness> (forgive me ahead of time) Do you really care about a drone-clone running Android on ATT's network? And is there a compelling feature or service that the drones would provide that say… Motorola won't have with their Android phone? Or Nokia, or Samsung? </harshness>

So did any media outlet pickup and champion the big news from CES this year?

Well if you consider the London Times a worthy source, I think they did. In a word, the breakout news of CES 2010 was the iSlate! Though Steve Jobs and Apple were not really demoing at CES, all that people were Tweeting about was the iSlate. Even poor and tired-looking Steve Ballmer called his upcoming HP joint venture into tablet computing a "Slate PC." Did his speech writers not hear that Apple's January 27th announced tablet was supposed to be called the iSlate? Is the industry already planning to call the entire category Slate Computing as Ballmer did? (As we call MP3 players iPods) I think for Ballmer and Microsoft to call anything "slate-like" or "slatish" or "windows-enhanced slate computing" is a big mistake. I think the industry groaned with Microsoft's lack of leadership at CES.

After all CES only comes around once a year. It wasn't like Microsoft didn't have time to get their "act" together. But for much of the hyped keynote, Mr. Ballmer looked tired and silly. Like he was putting on an act as bad as the young man who was presenting with him. When the young guy said, "Now imagine me in the roll of a student." (Good grief this is Microsoft! They could afford to get a REAL STUDENT to come on stage and describe their computing wet dream using WINDOWS 7, playing HALO Reach on the X-Box with Natal. But instead this smart young man kept having to "pretend" to be a student, and unfortunately, "pretend" to be interested in gaming and text books on computers (uh Kindle anyone) and "pretend" to be excited about potential of a world enhanced by Windows 7.

So Steve Jobs and his iSlate announcement completely silenced the buzz around CES this year as it did two years ago as Jobs was set to announce the iPhone the week following CES, at MacWorld in San Francisco. All eyes were on Jobs the entire week of CES back then. And I would argue that this year, not one manufacturer stepped up to the plate to do battle with the coming Apple announcement. Unless you consider 3D TV and Android phones a smashing development in consumer electronics.

For all of the non-Apple manufacturers, I hope that the iSlate doesn't do what the iPhone did to the phone market. Do you remember leading up to Jobs' announcement, all the other phone companies and carriers were saying how Apple was not really a threat.

Welcome to 2010. Apple is a rolling force of nature. A new iPod form factor every six months, faster iPhones in the Summer and Winter. And the last quarter of 2009 Apple turned in their highest profit in history. (ER… WHAT?)

That should be notice to the rest of the industry, waiting for Jobs to unveil the next wave of computing devices, that even Google will be struggling to copy. This could be the Year of the iSlate as the NYTimes declared in advance of CES this year. Or this could be smoke and mirrors, and Apple could fumble the ball. But if Steve Ballmer's performance was the other team's best hope, well… The game is in the bag! Maybe by summer the Dell's and Microsoft's of the world will have come 70% closer to copying Apple's success.

@jmacofearth
permalink: http://bit.ly/Yawnies-2010

Hilarious piece about Ballmer #CES and me. The return of Jobzilla at CES: http://bit.ly/jobzilla London Times Writers score a big win!

The collected CES 2010 stories from uber.la:

• CES 2010 – BIG NEWS: It's About the PHONE! (Dell, Windows Mobile, Android, Nexus)
• #CES… Wait, Are We Done With Ballmer and Co. Already? (part 2)
• NEWS FLASH: Microsoft Kills the PC at CES 2010: "Windows 7 – It's like enhanced TV!"
• #CES Day Three Begins with the iSlate Wannabes: HP, MSFT, Android-based Systems
• MSFT and HP Announce "Me-Too Tablet" Computer at CES 2010 Today
• iSlate from Apple Version 2.0 Features Leaked at CES 2010 (OS-M Revealed)
• Just Click It: Jan. 5 2010 (It's CES all over again today, jeeze!)
• CES Day One: Apple BUYS Twitter and Shows their Tablet Computer, the iSlate
• Apple iSlate Released Before CES: Rumors Abound, Non-Apple Execs Faint

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